Leaving a Group - Part 2: Leaving, Healing and Moving Forward

Welcome to part two. Last time we were talking about the reasons why one would leave a Pagan group. As you may recall there are many reasons, some very serious threats to mental and physical well being such as incidents of abuse or assault. Others leaned towards the more mundane (and most common) such as job or family commitments, changes within the group structure, changes in your own path and just plain growing apart. So for the sake of this article let's say you have joined a group and are now ready to leave, what do you do? Well I would have to say that it will depend on the reason why you are leaving. There is no "one size fits all" solution to this.

 Let's start with the most serious case, you have been sexually or physically assaulted by a member of the group. There are a few options available for you, but my advice in every case is run! Get out of the situation, get away from the abuser right now. The very next thing you must do is go to the Police. Not an easy thing to do but that person has committed a crime and will do it again if not stopped. Criminal behaviour is habitual, meaning that people who assault you are far more likely to have done it before and will not stop until we as a society step in and stop them. This is why we created laws and law enforcement in the first place.

I would also advise that once you are safely away from the abuser you inform the other members of the group about this abuse, you might not be the only one, and the leaders of the group must be made aware of this person. I am not a fan of keeping something this serious hush hush between you and one or two other people, this is a situation that calls on lots and lots of sunlight to disinfect it. Any group worth the wands they are waving would immediately step up to resolve the problem. If they do not then you do not want to give these people your trust! And in the case of the greater Pagan community I would wait and see what the rest of the group does, then if you are asked and are comfortable sharing some of your experiences do so, this will keep other safe!

After you have left the group, gone to the police and told the rest of the group why you left it's all over, right. Well not really, trauma like that does not go away overnight. This was never once your fault, but it’s hard to forget it and how it makes us feel. In cases of assault I cannot stress the importance of seeing a professional Psychologist or Psychiatrist, especially one that specializes in victims of trauma. These people will be able to help you process this event and find your way to healing. Take the time to find the right therapist for you, some therapy techniques may not match your needs. I would also recommend that you consider doing some rituals, and due to the nature of this event I strongly advise you get a trusted Pagan friend to help you with this.

The first ritual would be a good cord cutting ritual to rid yourself of any psychic ties you hold to the group and this individual. From there cleansing and grounding rituals to help cleanse yourself and help you keep your feet on the ground. At some point in time you may feel the need to do a ritual of release. Again get a friend to help you here. A great resource on rituals I have found is Steven Farmer's "Sacred Ceremony: How to Create Ceremonies for Healing, Transitions, and Celebrations". Mr. Farmer has a background in Shamanism and Psychology and I personally found this book to be a valuable tool in my ritual arsenal.

As for the groups that seem to have some shady dealings, such as the pressure to be at every event, the "you are so dumb you’re lucky we took you in", disappearing group money trick, or the "you must do the Great Rite with me to advance in your training" trick are another batch to run like heck away from. This one is a bit more of a murky group to leave. There is often either no criminal activity, or it is so veiled that it is really hard to see it, and even harder to prove it. This one has no real clear answers as to what to do when you leave it.

If you are suspect their activities are criminal then take whatever evidence you have to the police. They have the investigative abilities to look into the matter further and the experience to determine if there is criminal activity. If the activities are not criminal but make you incredibly uncomfortable get up and leave, and do not look back. Once again do a battery of cord cutting rituals and cleansing rituals. This is another case where you might also want to look into seeing a Psychologist or other counselor. Even though this is a less serious case than an assault, it is still a serious breach of trust and will make you feel very hurt and vulnerable. Again a good licensed therapist is trained to help you work through these issues.

I would still advise that you tell the members of the group why you left, with either a letter or an email. They have a right to know why you could not longer stay and again you might not be the only one who is having these problems. Outside of the group is where things get dicey. My personal advice would be that if you have some pagan friends you trust you can let them know. If others who you are unsure of ask you can very easily say "I was very uncomfortable with the way things were running and so I left". Its up to you if you want to speak further or not. This area is a fine line because it has the potential to save others from harm, or it can open the floodgates to harassment to you. You are going to have to decide if the level of harm you are keeping people from will outweigh the harm that you could be exposing yourself to.

In the case of the group changing their dynamics or their focus and it no longer lines up with your personal motivations, morals or direction feel free to gracefully bow out. This also goes for if you are having to move. Go to the leaders of the group and tell them honestly that because of the proposed (or actual) changes that the group is going with it no longer lines up with your spiritual goals and directions and therefore you resign (or conversely you can state that "because of the changes in my living and/or work situation I can no longer live up to the commitments and needs of the group and therefore I wish to resign"). Tell them that you wish them well and if they ask you to return anything, such as books or tools that belong to the group do so politely.

Stay positive and friendly with the other members as you leave and be sure to thank them for the time and effort they spent working with you. . You will once again want to take the time to do some rituals to cleanse and cut the psychic ties to the group. This will free both sides to move forwards. You might even want to talk to the group about having some kind of a final ritual together to help both sides heal from the move forward.

Once you have exited give yourself a break! This is a very sad time in your life and treat yourself with kindness, give yourself time to grieve this loss. Do not join or form a new group right away, this is like going on a rebound date and that is not fair to you or the others in these groups. Also keep the secrets of the group you left, do not share their rituals and spells with every pagan you see on the street. These are still sacred to that group and doing this disrespects them and  all the trust that you once shared with them. Continue to be respectful to the members and the group at all times.

Last, but not least, the group itself decides that it needs to fold. The first step obviously will be to make sure that this is a step your group really wants and really needs to make. Does the group want to completely dissolve and go their separate ways, or do they want to dissolve for a time and then reform with a new direction and focus? If you decide to completely dissolve and go your separate ways just not decide this at a meeting and then all walk away! This is going to cause you more headaches than it's worth. All your ties to the group, as well as the group identity you have created are still going to be there, so you need to shut this down and cut your ties. As a group design a closing ritual where you lay the group identity to rest, gently cut your magical ties to each other and take the time to say whatever you want to say (respectfully of course). Once again do not join a new group for some time, let yourself grieve properly and take the time to practice your own way and reaffirm your personal connection to the Gods you follow.

If the group decides to stand back up in a different format still have the closing and cord cutting ritual to make sure that you are not brining the old group into the new. After this ritual decide as a group a time in the future to meet. Give yourselves a few months to make sure that there is a clean break from the old group. After this time has passed meet together to decide how you want this new group to run, and make sure it is completely different from the first group. You closed down that first group for a reason, don't start up as if nothing has happened!

The bottom line is that leaving any group is hard, it takes an emotional toll on anybody. You need to take the time to do whatever you need to do to heal. You want to make sure you cut the psychic ties you have to the old group and thoroughly cleanse yourself so that you are able to move forwards with a fresh start. Finally the biggest step is going to be mentally, you have to want to heal and move forwards in order for any of this to be successful. You have to want to take whatever steps necessary to move forwards and be successful in your magical life.

Yours Humbly

The Redneck Pagan

Leaving a Group - Part 1: To Leave or Stay

Finding a Pagan Group/Temple/Grove/Coven/Circle seems to be the Holy Grail for Pagans. Almost every book I read there is at the very least a section, if not a whole chapter on how to find or form a group. There are websites full of articles on how to find a group, why finding a group is important, how wonderful it is to find a group and how it can become a second family. Many of these people, wisely so, give you warning signs of groups to avoid. They will tell you where to go to met them, ways to petition to join and failing that, how to form your own group. They give awesome rituals for you to use with the group, crafts and spells to work and even chants, prayers and songs to perform together. Finding a group sounds so great that we would do almost anything to find and be part of one!

 So let's say you have found a group to join, you're so stoked your significant other has to peel you off the ceiling for weeks on end. You meet them and after a few visits they decide to let you join (or after a few meetings with some people you decide to form a group), once again your significant other is having to chase you around cloud nine to remind you that it`s your turn to do the dishes. You spend weeks studying up, writing down ritual ideas and attending every single group event you can! You even spend hours hanging out with some members, having coffee, going shopping, watching movies. Life is great... kinda. As time goes on you notice that you don`t have the same enthusiasm , you feel blasé about events, the rituals do not move you and the whole group has gotten under your skin in a bad way. You begin to question why you are even bothering.

So is it time to pack up and move on... maybe, maybe not. Some situations, to me, necessitate an immediate departure! Any form of abuse, emotional, physical or sexual is not acceptable in any context, and is more than ample reason to run away fast! I also strongly recommend in cases of assault that you immediately go to your local police department and file charges. It will be the hardest thing you might have to do, but as long as these people hide in the shadows they will keep finding victims to assault. Sunlight is the best disinfectant, as my husband says, and by brining their behaviour to light will help to purge it from our communities. It might even help other victims come forward and seek justice as well.

 Other forms of abuse are more subtle but can be just as damaging, if your group leader or other group members are constantly berating you for not being able to come to certain events for medical or family reasons, that is abuse. Now if you are not living up to your commitments in the group, such as never being prepared, just not showing up because you had something better to do or canceling activities at the last minute, well they have a right to be ticked off. I`m talking about every time you offer an idea you get told it's dumb, or you show up to an event fully prepared but everything that goes wrong is blamed on you, If you are berated because you can`t make the odd movie night here and there because you don't have a baby sitter, or you can`t make a special event because of a family member is in hospital. These are still abusive situations and while not criminal, they are still damaging and let`s face it, life is tough enough without putting up with that shit.

If the group or group leaders begin asking for money for materials, building space or lessons, and don't show you where it all goes, they are probably crooks. Any good leader or group worth their salt has no problems providing receipts for everything and will never ask for more than what is needed. A larger organization that has permanent staff (volunteer or paid) or even a building of their own will have an established bank account and a financial reporting system. If these leaders are vague with their expenses, won`t let the general members see the bank statements and are still demanding annual membership fees, probably have something to hide and are not worth your time, attention or money.

Any group that tells you that you must do nude rituals  when you are very uncomfortable with the idea are not worthy of your trust. If the group leaders are saying that in order to get to a certain level you must master the Great Rite in Actual with them, even if you are against the idea and have told them upfront that you are not comfortable with it (for any reason at all), run away. This is a very subtle form of sexual abuse known as duress. Holding initiation or full membership in exchange for sex is wrong! Another subtle way they will try to pressure you to perform nude rituals and the Great Rite is by ignoring you. These people will be very interested in you, in providing extra training and mentorship. They will listen to what you have to say, will pump up your ego and flatter you, until you draw that line and say no sex. Suddenly these people do not have the time of day for you, they won`t respond to your emails, ignore you at group meeting and won`t tell you why. They hope that this pressure will make you do anything to get them to teach you again, including changing your mind and practicing the Great Rite with them. Did that last few sentences make your skin crawl, good, because it is disgusting what they are doing.

Other reasons to leave a group may not be as serious. One big reason to leave is if the group no longer matches your ethical and moral compass, if the group starts engaging in practices that you are not comfortable with or that you feel is morally wrong, you have every reason to walk away. These can be big things, like deciding to engage in multiple sexual partners without protection in ritual, or something as simple as calling together different pantheons of Gods in ritual when you firmly believe that you call form all the same pantheon (not saying one way is right or wrong, it is a personal choice).  The group may change their focus, from say a non pantheon specific path to an Egyptian path, and you are strictly Norse. If this is the case there is nothing wrong with wishing them well and walking away.

Another reason to walk away is if the group changes focus, for example let's say you work a job where you cannot belong to any political activist groups (government employees and Military personnel cannot be involved in public political groups due to the fact that they work for the people, they can still vote and write to their political representatives, but cannot be part of anything public). Now lets say the group you belong to decide to launch into a huge political campaign. If this is the case your livelihood is at risk and you will have to decide if your group or your job is more important.

Changing jobs or residence may also be a reason to step away from a group. If your work schedule is such that you cannot go to any meetings or rituals you may need to step aside since you cannot meet the commitments. Likewise if you are moving over two hours away you might not be able to be there for all the events due to the travel time (and the road conditions). It also might be better for you to step down and make a clean exit rather than trying to hold on until somebody else has to ask you to step away.

Major disagreements with group members can also be a reason to leave, but before you do examine the disagreements. The more time we spend with other people the more we notice things about them that drive us crazy! They might have a bad habit, a catchphrase or do something really dumb that just seems to act like nails on the chalkboard to us. In these cases you may just have to suck it up butter cup, sometimes people do stuff that annoys us, and we can learn to let it go, or let it wreck us. You might be having a disagreement with the group leaders, find out if its because you have some actual problems with how they are running things, or are you jealous because you wanted their position? If that's the cased then you have some issues to work out sweetie!

Boredom can drive you to distraction when in a group, after we spend a lot of time with other people we get comfortable and fall into patterns and ruts. This is not a very good reason to leave a group, you may want to bring it up with others in the group, do they feel the same? Maybe the group just needs a good shake up by trying out new rituals, reading new books, going on an outing to a local pagan event to get the creative juices flowing again.

There may not be a tangible reason to leave a group though. Sometimes we just grow apart, your path might take a different direction, you might no longer be getting any spiritual or emotional fulfillment from the group. You may still be on great terms with everyone but just have a very strong urge to move on. Or the group may as a group decide that it is time to move on and close the group. There is nothing wrong with any of these reasons, all good things must eventually come to an end. Just like the rest of the world groups are born, live, decline and eventually pass on. So, what do we do when it is time to leave a group? We'll discuss that next time!

Yours Humbly

The Redneck Pagan
 

Miley Cyrus and Robin Thicke - a Symptom of Society

This past Monday at lunch I was sitting with a group of co-workers and we were discussing what we did over the weekend. One of the ladies asked if anyone had seen the Music Video Awards (MVA's) and the performance of Miley Cyrus and Robin Thicke. Now I am by no means a music expert, through my youth group I had head of Miley Cyrus during her days as Hannah Montana, I had no idea who Robin Thicke is. I tend not to keep up with Hollywood and other such celebrities. I often confuse singers and actors with each other, and often get accused of living under a rock. My own music tastes are very eclectic, I often will listen to Loreena McKennitt, Inkubus Sukkubus, Sarah Brightman, Nightwish, Trisha Yearwood, Cher and Celtic Woman. Therefore I am no expert in the quality of pop music, but I digress.

During the course of the conversation I mentioned that I had not actually seen this performance we were discussing, so one of my coworkers proceeded to pull out her Iphone and caught me up what I had missed. I will grant you, my initial reaction was not a pleasant one. I did not really like the music all that much, I was rather confused by the oversized teddy bear backpacks, I was uncomfortable with the use of the foam finger and the movement I have been told is called "twerking". All in all I must say I personally did not enjoy the performance, actually I felt rather uncomfortable as I watched. I noted to my coworkers that it was not my cup of tea and changed the subject. Over the course of the rest of the week I attempted to push the performance out of my mind. This proved to be a far more difficult endeavor than I had initially assumed.

Since I had first witnessed this event I noticed that every time I opened my internet browser there was an article on it, several people on Twitter had "tweeted" about the event, and even Facebook had a cascade of attention on this particular event. With that much exposure, along with it being the main topic of conversation at the lunchroom one could not help but think about it, or read what others had to say. How it was obscene, how they were disgusted by it, how she ought to be ashamed of herself. They also mentioned how ashamed Mr. Thicke should be of himself, a married man with children grinding himself into a woman who is 16 years his junior on national television.

Still more fingers pointed towards the executive of the MVAs, how they had to know in advance that the performance would look like that and therefore they should not have allowed it to happen in the first place. There were lots of fingers pointing and tongues wagging.  I did my best to ignore it until a young lady from my youth group that is on my Facebook page "liked" a photograph with a photograph of Ms. Cyrus and a quote from an interview she did:

"Haters are gonna hate, but they are also gonna click on your Youtube to watch it. I don't really care, you helped me break the record. And if you were watching it just to hate on me I now hold a record, so I win." - Ms. Cyrus.

Now I gather this interview was done very recently so I would imagine this is still her opinion after the MVAs. Many people are applauding this attitude, the "I don't care, I do whatever I want" idea she has put out is very popular, but something irked at me somewhat. It appeared to me that she did not care what she was breaking a record for, she cared only that she broke a record. The music video she was talking about breaking the record on was for the song she sang at the MVAs. I heard this song on the radio one day, she sings about partying all night, having fun, kissing anybody, dancing like they are at the strip club. Based on this information it would seem that this is what M. Cyrus wants to be known for. Mr. Thicke's lyrics for the song he performed are about sexual acts, calling a woman "bitch" and hitting her and pulling her hair. This is what he would seem to wish to be known for.

Knowing that these two individuals are idolized by the youth of today, and hearing their lyrics, I cannot hlp but think of some of my personal idols; Malala Yousafzai. The young lady who was shot in the head by the Taliban for advocating for children and women's education. Winston Churchill who led Great Britain through WWII. "The Famous Five", Nellie McLung, Henrietta Muir Edwards, Emily Murphy, Louise McKinny and Irene Parlby. The women who launched "The Persons Case" in Canada that led to women being declared "qualified persons" which allowed them to sit in the Senate. Each of these women also significantly contributed to women across Canada being granted the right to vote. These are the people that I personally believe our youth should be looking up to and idolizing.

I found myself getting caught up in the anger directed at these young people for their behaviour, for putting themselves out as such a spectacle. Then I began to ask myself what is so different about these two people. This is nothing new under the glaring lights of the public lime light. Think back to Madonna kissing Brittney Spears and Christina Aguilara, or how about some of Lady Gaga's apperances. And who can forget the Superbowl performance where Justin Timberlake tore off the front of Janet Jackson's costume? Is what people witnessed at the MVA's this year really that different. If you ask me the answer is no. And do you want to know why... we asked for it. With all the fingers pointing, the accusations flying and the name calling we forgot where we should be firmly pointing the finger. At ourselves.

Now before you get totally cheesed off on me, hear me out. Why do these people do this? Power, prestige, adoration, money? Actually it is all of the above. Lets look at each item starting with money because it is the easiest I can demonstrate. We buy their albums, we download their songs, pay exorbitant amounts for their concerts, their perfumes and designer clothing. Adoration, just go to a concert and listen to the screaming fans, and the thousands of letters and cards. Feeling like you are loved by so many people can be a very intoxicating elixir. Prestige, they get into clubs and restaurants and if they get arrested they can afford the lawyers to get them a lighter sentence. This gives them, in our modern society, a great deal of power.

But here is the secret, we as a society have given them this power, we have created them to be what they are. Think about it, if we did not pay them to act the way they do, or reward them with attention, would they be doing this. We as a society have decided that this is what we want. We want our celebrities to be crass, obscene and vulgar. We reward them for it with out twitter feeds, Facebook posts, watching them on Youtube and even (and I am certainly not immune) our blogs. We reward them with attention and then again buy buying their albums and their merchandise. Then we blame them for their crude actions . They are not the driving force behind this behaviour, we are! While I can holed them accountable for their behaviour, I cannot totally blame them for it, because as a society we have created them to be what they are.

We have forgotten our own power, we have created this reality and it is our responsibility to change it. If we decide that we no longer find this behaviour acceptable then we must take our power in our own hands and direct it elsewhere. We could direct this power to either buying albums of different artists, or spending it by going to a local dinner theater or play. As a Pagan I know that we create our own reality, if we want to change this reality we have to change where we are directing our thoughts, our energy and our money.

Yours Humbly

The Redneck Pagan




 

Malala

http://ca.news.yahoo.com/pakistans-malala-celebrates-16th-birthday-u-n-education-141322045.html

I have no words to describe my admiration and respect for this amazing young woman! I can only ask please share this article, watch the video and share!

Your Humbly

The Redneck Pagan

The Holocaust Survivor Part Two

They were taken to a shed and the survivor remembered there being more and more people coming into the shed, she remembered it smelled bad and one day all the people in the shed left, walked into a field and she remembered being tied to her mother's back while everyone began to dig a hole. A fog came up while they were digging and her mother dropped her shovel and crawled into the woods. A few minutes later the gunshots rang out, the people who had been digging their own graves had been slaughtered.

After going back into the woods her mother found their cousins, their cousins found forged papers for them and smuggled them into another town. Stating they were the family of a Soviet soldier they lived in a village pretending to be Protestants until the end of the war. When they returned to their village they discovered the textile mill had been taken apart and their home stripped of all their belongings. They were able to recover a family photo album and a shirt her mother had made by the only person in the village who tried to save their belongings from thieves.

The rest of the village was very hostile to the family, blaming Jewish people for the German invasion, so they left the village and walked. They ended up walking across several countries with a friend who would eventually marry her mother, bribing border guards along the way. They made it to a Red Cross Displaced Persons camp and the Red Cross was able to locate cousins that had moved to Canada prior to the war. It took over a year for them to be able to come to Canada, with only a suitcase apiece full of all their possessions. Before leaving Europe the survivor and her mother had gone to a cemetery where her mother buried a piece of soap, the soap had been made in a Concentration Death Camp from the fat and ashes of people that had been burned in the crematoriums.

They came to Canada, started new lives and freely practiced their religion. The Holocaust Survivors who came to Canada and lived in Calgary banded together, supported each other as they adjusted to their new lives, and attempted to move forwards from the horrors of their pasts. Years later, as Holocaust survivors began to pass away the survivor who came to talk to us felt it was important to come forward and share her story. When asked if she and her mother ever returned to Europe the survivor said no, “all that land is a cemetery to us”. The presentation closed with a question and answer session, and then the Holocaust Educator who had brought the survivor gave a small closing speech. She said "they were the witnesses, and now we have shared their stories with you so that you too are witnesses. And so that you will know what can happen, and help keeping it from ever happening again".

Her story took about an hour to tell, all the while telling it she had a very calm and dignified manner. Her story captivated the kids and even some of my worse misbehavers were silent. Anybody who did try to talk during the story was told by other kids to stop talking (a miracle in my books). My husband and I spent some time talking to the survivor afterwards, commenting on how well our kids listened to her. My husband remarked on the struggles we have had to make them listen to us and he commented that perhaps the problem was too much freedom, to which she replied “Never, never, never. There can never be a thing as too much freedom. We are so lucky to have such a beautiful thing as our freedom, I am grateful even today for Canada.”

The sad thing is her story is not unique across human history. For thousands of years we have been this cruel to each other, countless atrocities have marred our heritage. The Armenian Massacres, The Killing Fields in Cambodia, The Genocide in Rwanda, are all tragedies of the highest order. We know the most about the Holocaust because the Germans had documented everything well with Photographs, Videos, official documents and the still standing Concentration Camps. There is also the trials at Nuremburg where thousands of witnesses provided testimony of the atrocities. And finally there are the survivors, those that were dehumanized and beaten, those who had to struggle everyday to live when those around them were intent on destroying them.

These survivors, of all genocides and atrocities of our species, have a strength that is beyond our capacity to measure. They look at the face of the depths of which we as a species can sink, they see things that cannot be described accurately in words, experience horrors that we sitting comfortably at home cannot understand and have found a way to live through it, and begin again. Those survivors have a level of courage that I am not sure I myself would be able to attain on the best of days.
These survivors not only find the courage to survive, they find the strength to recall these events and recount them to us. They have taken upon themselves not only the burden of their past, but the burden of being our memory. They remember that which we do not wish to remember, but should never forget. They push past the pain of their memories to remind us of what we must never become.

Yours Humbly
The Redneck Pagan

The Holocaust Survivor... Part 1

As some of you may know I work with youth. I work in a youth organization that has kids from the ages of 12-19, and we currently have about 60 in our program. Part of the mandate of our program is to teach Leadership, care for the environment, physical fitness and “to develop in youth the attributes of good citizenship”. Now what do we mean by good citizenship you ask, well I will tell you! We mean we want our kids to fully participate in Canadian Society, we want them to vote, we want them to care for their communities, we want them to contribute positively to our nation and we want them to protect the rights of others.

Recently we as the adults of the program have run across some unique challenges. First of all we are competing with the electronic era, why bother going out into the wilderness when I can just play Farmville? Play sports, sure I have a Wii and can play boxing, fencing and archery! Interact with others, I have Facebook chat! The electronic lure of the videogame and the internet has made it really hard for us to engage the kids. The rewards of our program take longer to achieve and often involve a lot of work, both intellectually and physically. A large bulk of the kids we see today would rather just play Call of Duty or whatever is popular today.

We have also come across the problem of making the kids understand how lucky they are. You see they go to school every day in relative safety, they might have a kid they don’t get along with, but for the most part they are safe. They can walk anywhere without getting shot at or having an explosion in the road. They get to have friends, go to the mall and the movies. They can date whomever they like, grow up to be whatever they want. When they get to the age of 18 they can have a say in our political system, they can choose whatever faith they want and read whatever they want. They have so much freedom without really understanding what it means to be free. They also know freedom, but often do not understand what a huge responsibility they have being free.

In order to try and get this point across to them, to help them understand the gift they have living in this great nation (Canada) we decided to show them what happens when that freedom is gone. To this end I contacted a local Jewish Center and asked them if they had a Holocaust Survivor to come and talk to us. Fortunately they had three who were still well enough to do the talks and one who was willing to travel to talk to us. This particular organization had started doing the talks in the early 1990’s when it was discovered that a high school teacher in Alberta was teaching students that the Holocaust had never happened.

The Holocaust educator brought the survivor to visit us on a dismal rainy day. The kids had had a full morning of working to prepare for our year end wrap up. They had just had some pop and pizza and were all buzzed up and hyperactive. We sat them down, explained to them who was coming and what behavior we were expecting from them and then we brought in the survivor. She was a very calm woman, and as soon as she had introduced herself she launched into her story and held our kids enthralled.

Born in 1940 she lived in what was then the Soviet Union, she told us her background as her mother had told it to her, having no memory of her first two years. Her mother had told her that they had lived in that particular village for several generations, and they lived on the same land as their cousins and her grandparents. The family owned a small textile factory that made cloth and thread. They were well known and well liked by their neighbours. Then in 1942 the Soviet army retreated, the army as they retreated warned the Jewish residents to come with them since the Germans were coming. The survivor's family refused to go, not understanding the threats.

When the German army and SS troops came they immediately took records of all the Jewish people in the town and began to move them out of the town to the Concentration Camps. The survivor's family was given protective papers because they ran a textile factory and the German army needed the cloth. Several months later the family got word that their protection was about to be revoked and they were to be deported. Some of the cousins ran into the woods and joined the partisans. The rest of her family slit up and went into hiding. Her father and older brother went one way and she and her mother another way.

She and her mother were hidden on a farm in the barn. They could only come out at night to take quick walks behind the barn, and the rest of the time they were hidden in the hay stacks. German troops would come by every once in a while and would shove their bayonet's through the hay, the survivor mentioned that she is not sure how close they came to her and her mother. A few months into being in hiding her family was betrayed by a neighbour and her grandparents, father and brother were caught and murdered. One of the neighbours told the Germans that had caught her father that they knew he had a wife and daughter.

The family hiding them had to send them away for fear of being discovered (those who were caught hiding Jewish people were murdered as well, along with their families).So taking a little food the survivor's mother tied her to her back and walked into the woods. hey spent a few months in the woods, and the survivor remembered her mother taking her and swishing her through the snow. At the time she thought it was a game but it turned out to be to keep her from freezing to death. While attempting to get out of the area they were caught by the SS.
... to be continued

D-Day

Today in 1944 Operation Neptune commenced. Starting with the an airborne assault landing of 24,000 British, American and Canadian airborne troops shortly after midnight, and an amphibious landing. of Allied infantry and armoured divisions on the coast of France starting at 6:30 am. The landings took place along a 50-mile (80 km) stretch of the Normandy coast divided into five sectors: Utah, Omaha, Gold, Juno, and Sword.

At the end of the operation the Allied had gained a foothold in Europe. This landing would eventually lead to the Surrender of Nazi Germany, the Liberation of Europe, the rescue of millions of civilians and halted the expansion of Nazi Germany. the landings involved over 156 000 combatants of the Allied Forces, and at the end of the landings there were over 12 000 casualties.

 

69 Years ago today the tide of war turned, the Allies landed and had to fight for every inch of the beaches, they fought up the beaches and into the countryside, up into the villages, and across the countryside. Nazi Germany would sign the Total and Unconditional surrender on May 7, 1945. Japan would surrender on August 15, 1945.

 

Why do I post this you may ask? This is a blog about a Redneck Pagan, who writes about religion and spirituality, Magic, Spells and sarcastic commentaries on the state of Modern Society from the odd view point and sense of humour I have. Well to be honest, it has everything to do with me.

 

You see we are here today, free and speaking English because of the bold men that jumped from the security of the ships, into the gunfire on the beaches. Had Nazi Germany been allowed to continue to expand they very well may have invaded North America, which includes my home here in Canada. Had they not been halted they would have ruthlessly cut through to our shores, to our beloved free nation. They would have stomped out any opposition, executing anybody who did not agree with their policies, or who did not meet their standard of Racial Purity.

 

I can sit here and be sarcastic, write my blog, work in the job I choose, marry whomever I want, follow the religion of my choice and go to school, because I am free. I am free because many men and women have laid down their lives to give me this great gift. I can sleep in my bed safe at night because there are people who stand between me and those that would do me and my country harm.

 

For a long long time in the days of WWII Europe was swallowed by darkness, slavery and mass murder were every day occurances. Violence, oppression and tyranny were the way of life for millions. As a species the human race sank to a level of such depravity and darkness that we had not even been able to convieve of in our deepest and most desperate nightmares. June 6, 1944 the world came together and said "NO MORE, the darkness stops here, we will push you back, we will fight and librate those you have enslaved, we will hunt you down and we will stop you".

 

That is why I honour today, and all those who took part in it, who laid their lives on the line and fought forwards, to defeat the darkness. I live in the light that they secured for me.

 

Yours Humbly

 

The Redneck Pagan

 

Original CBS broadcast of the invasion:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9vSpvFLpS7I

Rain Break!

Well the best laid plans of men and mice... I think most of my plans are laid by a mouse some days! The weather the last two weeks has been nice and warm and so I went outdoors and attacked our garden and yard! We cleaned up all the leaves that were buried by winter’s sudden arrival in October, pulled a ton of weeds from the flower beds and tilled the vegetable garden. It took us three hours with both of us on the job with a lawnmower apiece but we were able to get the lawn mowed before the rains settled in! And in less than a week it looks like the lawn needs it again!

We are busy running ahead with our Youth Group’s year end wrap up in early June, which will be nice. As much as I love the kids and the program it can be exhausting running the hours we do and therefore some rest and relaxation is going to be very much in order. My husband and I are planning to do lots of camping and day trips into the wilderness this summer, which will be just what the doctor ordered!

I have been busy taking lots of pictures of our trees and yard and will be sharing them as soon as I find where on earth I put the memory card this time! I know it is in a safe place... I just wish for the life of me I could remember where on earth it was that I put it! I have so many wonderful safe places at home, that I have no clue where they are!

I have also been working on scheming up some new blog topics that will be coming out over the course of the summer, along with my random pieces of information, rants and raves! Now to just find the time to sit down and continue updating everyone!

Yours Humbly

The Redneck Pagan

Magic is afoot... and so is change!

I still live, honest! And I once again have to convey an apology as I am once again not posting due to being extremely busy. We have just finished off the settling of my Mother in Law's estate, which included cleaning out her house. We are also getting ready to wrap up the training year in the youth group I belong to and that has meant that every weekend I am just at a run getting things wrapped up. We had our weekend field training last weekend, this weekend a meeting, next weekend they are cleaning up the building and grounds of our local hospice, the weekend after that they go flying, then it's our final wrap up. Somewhere sandwiched in there we are doing regular training nights, band nights and at the end of May we are lucky to have a local Holocaust Survivor coming in to give a presentation (I'll let you know how that one goes, I think it will be a great experience for the kids, even as heartbreaking as it is).

So with all of this, along with the chores of daily living, I have not been writing much. However what I lack in writing, I more than make up for in thinking (this could be trouble). I am plotting some changes to the way I work this blog. You might have noticed that most of my posts are nice essay formats. I chose that when I first started this blog in the middle of summer. Well after almost a year at it I realize that there are going to be times in my life (like now) that I may not have the time to wholly devote to the time and work of the longer article. I also found the format somewhat constricting, having to have well thought out and planned arguments... sometimes I just want to rant! Or share a story, or a picture.

Therefore with all this in mind I have come to the conclusion to tweak some things within this blog. I am adding to it. There are still going to be times when I want to write the full blown articles and will continue to do so whenever I can.  I am also going to be doing the odd things such as "Redneck Rants", when something drives me nuts I will probably write about it here and explore why I find it annoying (like kids runny loose in the supermarket, Facebook game requests, or using the cell phone while going to the bathroom). "Redneck Raves" will be the opposite, things that I absolutely love (chocolate will probably be on the list, people who inspire me, events I attend etc). "Redneck Recommends" will be books, movies and television shows I find worth watching.

Also expect a lot of garden pictures, I love taking pictures in my garden and go a little crazy. I'm also thinking of adding the odd spell, ritual or magical thing I do share some ideas and tricks I have learned along the way (like when mixing oils into clay wear gloves...). I might even ask readers to let me know what they like to read, or have them ask me questions and I will answer in a post. Hopefully this will liven things up and allow me time to explore and share my path, while keeping somewhat sane!

Hope you enjoy this new aspect of the journey with me.

Yours Humbly

The Redneck Pagan

Spring Rain

We had some rain today, this was sunset at our place... you don't get this kind of sky in a big city often! I have found that since moving to our little town I have been blessed with the ability to see more of the Natural world! The more I see, the more in awe I am!

 

View from the side door:



 

Off the back porch! Look at the colours in the clouds! I wish I could share the smell of the rain, so fresh!

 

 

 

My Top Ten Favorite Cauldrons... Part 3

4. Kitchen Aid: Ahhh, the modern day wonder of the Kitchen Aid Mixer.... The marvel of the device, that mixes, makes pasta and a billion other things I have yet to figure out. The mixer is one of the newer additions to my cauldron lists! My husband and I bought our house a little over a year ago. Prior to living where we are now we lived in a postage stamp sized basement suite. You had a stove, a sink, about 50 inches of counter space and the fridge. I was happy to be able to have my toaster and coffee maker on the counter every day. 

With so little kitchen space neither my husband nor I did much in the kitchen. We hardly had room for the basic utensils so having any specialty items was out of the question. If one person was cooking the other had to stand in the living room as two people would not fit in that space. Then we moved and got a kitchen with more cupboards and counters that I had ever had. My husband’s mother gave us some new pots and a I shopped diligently at places like Wal-mart and Costco for new frying pans, skillets and other kitchen tools. When we got married we bought ourselves a bread maker that paid for itself within the first two months! Then for Christmas/Yule my dad and his wife gave us a Kitchen Aid Mixer.

I was overjoyed and remarkably intimidated. You see I normally did not cook. In the old apartment it was a basic roast or grilled chicken, BBQ in the summer. I might have some roast beef with potatoes and frozen vegetables, but that was it. Any cookies or pies in our house were store bought. But with the new mixer I talked learning to bake. I went through multiple cookie recipes, with the mixer humming along, we tried different muffins, I even used it for mixing homemade sauces. My ultimate achievement was learning to make pie crusts!

The mixer did more than just transform my food from a pile of ingredients to a dough, it transformed our health. By learning to bake I was able to control the ingredients in our food, I was able to invest in my local farmers by buying farm fresh eggs and produce. I knew exactly what we were putting in our bodies, and without all the chemicals we began losing some flub (even when I was eating more cookies than normal). I was also able to share something of my work with friends and family when they came to visit, or take a plate of cookies to a staff meeting to share.

But most of all it helped me transform myself. I had spent a long time toying with the notion of doing more cooking and baking at home, but figured I did not have the time or the skills to do so. Having the mixer took away my excuse of no time, it was so incredibly simple and quick to throw the ingredients together, and then I could do a load of laundry while the cookie baked or the sauce warmed up. The ease of the mixing showed me that I could in fact follow a recipe and make delicious treats and meals for our family. While this may sound trivial to many, this means a great deal to me, boosted my confidence and has granted me a beautiful growth opportunity.

3. Popcorn Popper: I will confess, I am addicted to popcorn. Badly. In college I would often eat nothing but popcorn during my long study and paper writing sessions. It was quick and easy to throw a bag of popcorn into the microwave, grab a drink and then go back downstairs for another three hour marathon of cramming my brain full of facts, dates, diagnostic criteria and theories of human brain development. In fact most of my meals were like that, pre packaged, microwavable and quick. Thanks to my diligence, hard work and gracious gift of free room and board from my father, I graduated.

I moved out into my own place and began to make my own way in the world, but my eating habits stayed right in college. I kept eating convenience food, lots of coffee and pop, and of course, the microwave popcorn. I paid no attention at all to what I was putting in my body and my weight suffered. In two years I went up six dress sizes and put on a good 70-100 pounds. NOT GOOD! I noticed that none of my clothes fit anymore and I was out of breath just walking to the photocopier. Time for a change

For the next six months I read up on what the food I was eating actually had in it, and I would like the term food for these items to be revoked. I read on what it was doing to my body (besides the obvious signs of weight gain). I realized just how suicidal my eating habits had become and began the long process of making a change. It was hard, I had to change everything I did and thought about food. Add to that we had a very tiny kitchen at that time and so preparation space did not exist. Luckily we were able to buy our own home and it came with a huge kitchen. I began cooking and eating better... except that damn microwave popcorn! It seemed to be a stumbling block that I could not surmount.

Then one day at Lee Valley (watch out, Lee Valley is like crack) my husband picked up a stove top popcorn popper. I thought he was crazy, but he promised to make me the best popcorn I had ever had. So that night at home he made popcorn on the stove, drizzled a little olive oil and some sea salt on it, and gave it to me to try. He did not lie. It was amazing! Way tastier than my microwave popcorn, and I didn’t feel gross after munching on it. What’s more I seemed to need to eat less of it to curb the craving!

He showed me how to use it and I became a stove top popcorn making maniac! I can eat the stuff straight or with the drizzle of olive oil. And something else interesting happened, I stopped wanting a lot of the junk I was eating. I still occasionally indulge in some chips and pretzels, but I find I want less of them, and my body is very happy with me. In seven months I dropped a ton of weight (when we went to get married I had to take in my wedding dress 2 ½ inches on both sides) and have become a mad gardener, growing food for my family.

It sounds very silly to say, but before the popper I felt like I was doomed to forever be fighting off cravings for unhealthy food and doomed to be a larger woman. With the microwave popcorn thoroughly kicked (I can’t even stand the smell of the stuff anymore) I felt like I could take on the world and accomplish any and all weight loss goals I have, I have been transformed. I still have a long way to go, but I am on the right track!

2. Pentagram: My hunt for the perfect cauldron has taken me all over the place, from places like Wal-Mart and Value Village, to online pagan shops. Bass Pro and other outdoor stores have also been my hunting grounds. I had settled for my brass Value Village Flower Planter cauldron (it now serves as my portable fire bowl), I then found my mini cauldron’s on eBay. They had the look and the feel I wanted, but their size was a problem at times. When I wanted to do larger workings, or use my cauldron to burn papers in I ran into some troubles. The larger papers did not get enough air to burn properly in the little ones. I would have to sit there and tear my paper up into little pieces.

I also found that for some rituals the size of the little ones made them really hard to find on a dark altar cloth in the middle of the night! The brass one was doing ok, but the feel was just all wrong to me. I know that tools really are not necessary but when you are rather new to the game (as I was back then) you don’t really get that. After all you want to be a real witch, cast great spells, do moving rituals... everything has to be just right! So I moped and griped to myself about the cauldron and bided my time.

One day after a ritual I had to leave the area rather quickly (some of you may recall my top ten stupid list that involved a fire on a hilltop) and so ended up having to kick my brass cauldron (former flower pot) and stomp out my fire, then singed my hands a little when I tried to pick it up. I ended up having to wrap it in a blanket to be able to carry it home. I was very frustrated by the lack of lid and the fact that I did not have a carrying handle (my hands were not pleased with that one in particular).

I went to work out of province for two months where I had a very difficult experience. I faced my first, and only, case of persecution because of my religion. It was not easy, actually I was downright terrified. Luckily for me the group I was with was very supportive and the individual was reprimanded and invited not to return because of this (and a few other incidents of religious persecution against others of differing faiths). While the incident had definitely left me feeling very shaken and vulnerable, it had also restored some of my faith in my fellow humans and had given me the opportunity to do some deep soul searching.

You see at this camp my space was limited so I had left almost all my tools at home. I had only brought a handmade God and Goddess statue and some prayer books I had bought. So I went to a local park, I sat myself down and had a long heart to heart with myself. I prayed for guidance, for wisdom and healing. No tools, no props, no candles or robes, just me and the Gods. While sitting in this park, my back against a tree, I felt all my feelings of anger, hurt, betrayal and fear slip out of me and into the earth. I felt the cool breeze of the evening, listened to a few bird and felt calm and at peace.

I found within myself the strength I needed to get through the next few days and the courage to show my face again with my head held high. Whenever I felt my strength wane I gave a silent prayer and found myself restored. I had finally figured out that the tools mean diddly squat. That what is truly powerful is the connection I make within myself and with my Gods. A few months later I was with a friend at a local Pagan store when I came across a display of Cauldrons. They had every shape and size imaginable, including three that were exactly what I had been looking for. I picked each one up and held it in my hands. When I lifted the third one it felt warm in my hands and I could feel my body tingle. I knew it was the right one.

As we drove home I was looking out the window, marveling at my new cauldron, and wondering why the heck it took me so long to find it. I don’t know if I figured this part out on my own or if it was inspired within me somehow: If you were never powerful enough to work magic without it, what on earth made you think you would be enough with it? I found that cauldron after I stopped relying on tools to make my own magic. I found it after I learned that tools certainly enhance my practice, but do not determine it. Finding this cauldron felt, at least to me, like a signal that I was learning and advancing in my craft. I still have a hell of a ways to go, and will never stop learning, but when I look at that cauldron I remember just how far I have come.

1. Bathtub: Yes you read that right, my favorite cauldron of all times is the bathtub! It is the only cauldron I know that I can fit my whole body into! A bathtub is truly a wondrous tool, and a fairly recent modern addition. Think about this for a minute: up until indoor plumbing in the modern era (like the past 100 years) if people wanted to have a bath they had to haul the water, heat it up on a stove and then pour it into a wash bin of types for you to have a bath. Not exactly convenient is it? Most people probably only bathed ever week.

Earlier than that people bathed less frequently, for example do you know why June was the marrying month? Because people had their annual... yes annual... bath in May, so in June they were not as stinky! Some historians theorize that flowers for the bride was to cover the smell of body odor (I don’t know if that is true or not, just something I read). Could you imagine standing next to somebody who does not bathe regularly?!? I know after two or three days of camping I am pretty ripe and need to wash off quickly if I want to be able to stand myself! Now imagine a village full of it! I am very grateful to be born in a time when people bathe regularly (and discovered the joy of deodorant).

Advances in overall hygiene is definitely one of the reasons that the tub makes it to the top of my list, but there are a few other reasons too. I have a bad back, some of it is general spinal structure (I have a few very small curvatures to the spine that cause discomfort), and some of it is because I am a bit overweight. I am working on getting to a healthier weight and strengthening the muscles of my back but this is a process that takes time. In the meantime when I am working at moving and lifting items I sometimes over do it and hurt myself. Other times I have hurt myself doing some exercises (I do not bend well at this time).

When this happens I poor a hot bath with and just let the heat melt the pain and tension away. If I get a soak in early enough I don’t have to use painkillers to help me sleep, which means less toxins in my body! I also use the hot soak method when I am beginning to get a cold. I also use some eucalyptus oils to steam out the cold (and the sinuses). Again it helps me get my body back in order without the use of chemicals. If I trade up the eucalyptus oil for a few drops of Lavender oil after a long day at work I can feel all my tensions melt away.

And finally the cleansing powers of a bath cannot be denied! Anytime I am in a bad mood, or just feeling icky I draw a hot bath, light some candles and incense. I pop in a bath bomb and handful of sea salt and soak away. I have sometimes said a prayer over the water or as the water drains out I thank it for taking away all that ails me. Afterwards I usually am able to get a great night’s sleep and feel 100 times better the next morning. Never underestimate the healing power of water!

So there you have it, a mix of magical and practical (or the practical made magical) that makes up my top ten favorite cauldrons!

Yours Humbly

The Redneck Pagan

*Note:

Apparently I have been told that the use of flowers to cover BO is a myth because people have bathed regularly in history. If the history professor who told me this eight years ago when we were discussing medieval British and Celtic (who told me about the annual baths, as opposed to swimming) was alive today I would be sure to have informed him that his fifty some years of study was all a myth.

My Top Ten Favorite Cauldrons... Part 2

7. Mini’s: When I first started on the pagan path I went a little nuts. You see in one of the first books I read it gave a list of the basic Witch’s tools, and a list of optional tools. Now I have to be honest, I was a little insecure at that age. Ok, I was a whole lot insecure back then (I still am from time to time). When I started studying Witchcraft I had to make sure I was doing things right. I read what I perceived to be the best books (well the most recommended books), I wore tons of gemstone jewelry (thank Goddess I never fell into a body of water, I would have sunk) and made a general fool of myself. But the biggest thing I had to do was collect all the right tools. I could not find a good broom so I made my first one, I bought a knife to use as my athame, and I burned pounds of incense and candles (still guilty of that one). The hardest thing for me to find was the cauldron.

I searched all over for a proper cauldron, but had no idea where to look. Eventually one day while cruising Value Village for a 50’s style costume. I was looking at the sweaters when I looked up and to my amazement there was a brass flower planter above me. It was shaped exactly like a cauldron! It wasn’t cast iron but it would do. I took it home and used it. It wasn’t a bad cauldron but I desperately wanted a Cast Iron cauldron. Then came the day I discovered the magic of ebay! It was like a whole new world for me. After finding a nice little goddess statue and a pentacle necklace I decided to try my luck and search for a cauldron.

I was blown away at the sheer amount of cauldrons they had available! It was unbelievable to my little mind that so many varieties could exist and I was like a kid in the candy store. I searched and searched until I found it, the perfect one. And for an amazingly low price. There were two of them, one with a pentagram and one with the triple moon symbol. I bid on both, figuring that somebody would outbid me on one. I won both. I was a little surprised but they were low enough in price that I wasn’t worried. I waited with bated breath for my new perfect cauldrons to arrive. Then one day two tiny boxes arrived in the mail… it was my cauldrons.

I opened them and my heart sank. They were miniscule, like three inches high! I was expecting something like four times their size. I checked the purchase records on e-bay and realized that I had indeed bid on two miniscule cauldrons. Well aren’t I a little bunch of brains! I felt utterly dejected. While they looked right they were not my perfect cauldrons. I debated sending them back or giving them away since they were wrong and I didn’t really think that I wanted them. A few days later I wanted to do a ritual I had read about and having nothing else I grabbed one of the little cauldrons, and to my utter amazement it worked perfectly.

I used each of them multiple times in ritual, they were perfect to take with me to outdoor rituals, they came with me to work at summer camps, or to do rituals when I was travelling. They have held candles, incense, ingredients for my spells and when my husband and I bought our wedding rings we placed one in each cauldron until the day we were ready to wear them. The little cauldrons that I never thought I would ever use still now sit on our shrine, on either side of our statue of the Goddess Danu. I still use them every couple of weeks.

7. Turkey Roaster: The Turkey roaster, I am sure this has left some people scratching their heads. And others are probably nodding in agreement. For many people the turkey dinner holds a special place in our hearts. The traditional feast of Christmas and Thanksgiving for millions, a meal that is shared amongst those we love best, or those or mom tells us we have to get along with best. The meal that we gather around to celebrate, to count our blessings, to catch up on family news and sometimes argue with each other. So it seems almost natural that this be on my list.

However I am not talking about any old turkey roaster here. I am talking about a very special family heirloom. You see two months ago I inherited this turkey roaster from my Mother in Law (I am sorry to report she lost her battle with Cancer). When my husband asked me if there was anything in particular I wanted from his mother’s house I asked for her baking tools (such as pie plates and measuring cups, as I have recently learned to bake) and the turkey roaster. He looked at me for a moment and said ok. We were driving to do a check on his mom’s house one day when he asked me why the roaster.

You see my husband was married once before me for several years, they had a child together. Over the years his ex wife had been to many family gatherings and dinners. They separate and began their divorce proceedings. During that time my husband and I began to date and eventually I was invited to his parents place for Christmas dinner to meet the family. GULP… the whole family? Well most of it… his aunt, his brother, his niece and nephew… can we say stressed!!!! I was terrified. I worried that they would not like me, that they would be mad that he brought me, that I was there and not his ex wife, and that they would not approve of me.

So the big day rolled around and away we went to meet the family. I walked into a whirlwind of activity. My husband’s father and brother were in the living room with his nephew and his niece’s boyfriend. His mother, aunt and niece were in the kitchen, whipping up a storm. Not knowing what else to do after I was introduced I offered to help in the kitchen… and I was put to work right away. Conversations flew as the meal was prepared. I made the gravy in the Turkey roaster and at dinner time it was a hit. After the meal I helped with the clean up and washed dishes when it hit me. I felt at home, I was no longer scared.

Over the next four years I came to many dinners, and we used the roaster almost every time. We gathered together every year at Christmas, Easter and Thanksgiving. Even after my husband’s father passed away we still gathered with his mother. When she became ill the family came together to ensure she still had a wonderful dinner with us all. Now that she is gone that roaster to me has symbolized the power and magic of sharing food. It makes strangers friends, and scared new girlfriends part of the family. Over Christmas dinner, stirring gravy in a simple turkey roaster I transformed from a stranger, to a welcomed member of the family.

5. Farmers Market: In the bigger city near where I live they have a Farmers Market every Saturday from May until September. My husband introduced me to them a few years ago and I am thoroughly hooked! I am not a morning person; I will often sleep until late in the morning and wake up very slowly, I then will stay up way to late at night. But for the Farmer’s Market I am up, out of bed, dressed and with a cup of coffee in my hand before my husband has been able to perceive that it is morning!

If you have not had the chance to go to the farmer’s market I highly recommend it! The one that we go to has a little bit of everything, you have people selling fruits, vegetables and garden plants. You have people with amazing fresh local cheeses and meats, breads of all shapes and sizes. Then there are the honey farmers... hello clover honey addiction! People selling jewelry, furniture, toys, handcrafted clothing and pottery. We even had some Amish (yeah, apparently there is Amish in Alberta, totally news to me) selling handmade furniture. Have you ever seen Amish Furniture, those people are amazing craftsmen!

They often have live performers at the markets. I have had the delight of listening to a Peruvian Piper playing some beautiful melodies on pan pipes. Another time there was a folk singing group with a melody that made me want to jump up and dance. And the one time there was a Celtic harpist, playing a melody that seemed to creep out from the mists of time and arrest your attention as it wove its spell upon you.

One bright sunny morning I hauled my backside out bed and met my husband (then boyfriend) at the market. We wandered through the rows upon rows of people, finding all kinds of treasures. My husband found a piece of oak with a Raven carved into the top with Ogham writing, which was very fitting for a Celt like him. We picked up some nice sausages for breakfast, along with some cheese and fresh honey. I picked up a few groceries for the week, and we stopped for a long time to listen to the Harp.

We were getting ready to leave when we stumbled into a booth selling antiques. Sitting off to the side, all by its lonesome was an old cast Iron pot. It had three little nubs for legs, the lid had been lost ages ago. The inside had some rust from years of neglect and it was covered in soot on the outside. I walked over to it, drawn by it and picked it up. When I asked the lady at the booth about it she said “found it after I bought some boxes at an estate sale on some acreage. Ten bucks sounds fair?” I bought it, took it home and cleaned it. Even before I cleaned this new cauldron it seemed to gleam! I could just envision it, sitting on a woodstove, keeping supper warm. The antique dealer figured it came from sometime between 1900-1920, a staple item in most households at the time, very common item.

But it was not so common to me, it felt warm, cheerful and strong. It reminded me of the women who build the province and the country I live in. Who kept the houses clean, the men fed and the families at peace. The women who had the independence of spirit to launch this province into being the first in Canada to give women the vote in 1916 (two full years before Women won the right to vote nationally). The women who held families together when their men fought in wars far away. In my hands, I was holding not only a representation of the Goddess, but a representation of the women who went before me, who sacrificed much for the future generation. It sits in my house, near the fireplace, guarding the Hearth and Heart as women have for generations.

My Top Ten Favorite Cauldrons... Part 1

I think everyone has a favorite magical tool, I have a friend who can never pass up an interesting Athame, another friend of mine collects candle holders and incense holders. I have read of broom and wand collectors, Chalice lovers and multiple different Books of Shadows. (Hmmm… actually I might fall into all of these categories… good thing I clean out my house annually!) But the big one for me, the item I am always drawn too is the Cauldron! It doesn’t matter that I have a great Cauldron… or four! Anytime I go to a Pagan, Witch and New Age shop I am drawn to the Cauldrons. I even check out the Cast Iron Dutch Ovens in sporting goods shops (yes I visit those, often actually, I am a Redneck after all!) And when I am not using or playing with my “Magical” Cauldrons then I am using one that some would consider to be more mundane! So for your entertainment (or boredom) here are my favorite cauldrons!

10 Coffee Pot: my husband will agree with me 100% on this and depending on the day he might even score it higher than I would. I know it is bad but I am totally addicted to coffee! I have usually two to three cups a day (always in the morning) and if my friends and I get together for coffee I come home so wired that I actually will start scrubbing floors at One AM. But why do I consider this a cauldron?
Well the essential power of the cauldron is transformation right? The mixing of ingredients to make something new! Cauldrons play a huge part in many Pagan traditions and Myths. And in a coffee pot you take coffee beans and water, filter and voila! A hot, brown brew that takes a person who will literally growl at anything that moves first thing in the morning to a functioning member of society who is able to verbally express herself!

There is also something about gathering friends together and sharing a cup of coffee. At the youth group I work with we often have early morning activities. We of the adult staff will often meet before the activity over a “Timmies” (or for you non Canadians our there: a cup of Tim Hortons Coffee). We stand together, talking, sharing until the kids start showing up. I have had some of my best conversations this way and it strengthens our bonds of teamwork and friendship. (and for those of you who say that the coffee is delivered to us via a cup and so that would be a Chalice… don’t worry the coffee cup is on my top ten favorite chalices for the same reasons above!)

9 Dutch Oven: Ok so I really should not call this one my cauldron since it technically is my husband’s cauldron, but I will count it on this list anyway! When he gets his own blog he can claim it then! Anyway, getting back to the topic at hand, why is it on this list? Well how many of you camp? Actually let me back up for a second, you see my husband and I are epic campers! We did not get out much last year but we plan to rectify that situation this year. We usually like to be out for four days, at least. A weekend just isn’t enough for us. Now we do the weekend camp thing in a small tent, but we are looking at purchasing a nice big canvas outfitters tent, one that can take a stove (hello year round camping!!!!)

While we are camping our resources are obviously different. Food has to be kept in coolers rather than a refrigerator, or it has to be canned as food poisoning is not on my agenda. So what my husband will do is cook up some hamburger and throw it in a container. We put it in the cooler with a ton of ice and frozen veggies. With the amount of ice he uses the cooler stays cold for three days… easily. On the second day of camping he will throw the hamburger, the frozen veggies, a bit of beef stock and some spices into that Dutch Oven and then sit it in the campfire. He lets it cook over the day and by night we have a great one pot meal.

We have used it in the house with the BBQ and once in the regular oven but it is not the same. There is something magical about sitting at the campfire, watching the sun creep its way under the horizon, and eating our dinner as our ancestors once did. I also treasure these moments because my Husband and I are very busy people, we both work full time and work with the youth group. We often are at one form of a work or another, even at home. The moments that we have to camp, to gather around the fire together, share a meal, just us and the pooches, that is magic at its finest!

8 Crock Pot: My reason for loving this invention is sheer laziness. I throw something in, next day at supper I have food! SIMPLE! But the simplicity of it does not negate the power it has. First of all, like any cauldron there is the essence of transformation. A chunk of raw beef is slapped down, some broth poured over it and in a day you have a tender roast that fills the stomach and makes you feel at home (I grew up in Alberta, roast beef is a staple in our households). The convenience of this is magical not only in that it feeds us, but in the time it saves.

You see our work at the youth group gives us some late nights, especially Tuesday. On a Tuesday we can expect it to be midnight before we even get home, and living out of town from where we work means getting up at six in the morning. Wednesday is BRUTAL! Working on minimum sleep we somehow find the strength to slug our way through the day. By the time we get home we are mentally and physically exhausted, not always thinking clearly and often a tad on the grumpy side (more me than my Husband). Having a hot meal ready as soon as we walk in the door is a blessing! We get well fed in a snap, without having to resort to fast food restaurants that often have the nutritional equivalent to a catcher’s mitt. We also get to sit together, share a moment and some light conversation.

When supper is over, the leftovers are super easy to deal with. I put the leftovers back into the pot, lift it out of the heating unit and place it in the fridge. The dishes go in the dishwasher and we both get to sit back, relax and go to bed early! The internet has allowed me the opportunity to explore multiple recipes to use in the Crock Pot and they have come in handy on other occasions. I throw everything in the pot the night before, have supper and still have time to perform my rituals and spells, while feeding my body well, and ensuring I can still get to bed at a decent time. My husband has also loved the experimentations of soups and stews during our long winter nights. A good stew warms you up, and fills you up for those wonderful moments of shoveling 3 feet of snow off the driveway.

Stay tuned for part two!

The Pagan and the Papacy

Many years ago I was introduced to Catholicism, partially from my Catholic Grandmother, and partially from spending a few years in the only French Immersion school in our city that was a Catholic school. I am afraid I have no horror stories to share with you on this topic. I have a lot of respect for 99% of the Catholics. There are still a few of them that I am not very fond of, but such is human nature. In any group there are going to be good people, people who fall a little short of the mark, and absolutely reprehensible individuals. I do not blame religion or culture for them, I blame the individual and those who enabled them. But that is not the point of this conversation today, I will tackle that landmine at a later date.

One of the things that my time in Catholic School taught me was the structure and history of the Church, including the Papacy. I learned about Priests and Nuns, Bishops and Cardinals, about living a life of service to God. There was something about this idea of service that struck a cord with me, I did my best to be a good Christian, but my heart was not in it. I felt my feet were destined to walk another path, so I moved away from Christianity. But I never put down the idea of service to others, nor did I loose my interest in the history and Traditions of the Church. Then a pope died.

When Pope John Paul II passed away I learned a bit more about the way that the College of Cardinals passes on the power from one pope to another, and I watched with interest as the Conclave progressed, until the day the white smoke was seen above the Sistine Chapel. I was introduced to Pope Benedict XVI (now Pope Emeritus). I watched the announcement and part of his speech. A few days later I looked up pictures of his inauguration. After that I have to be honest, I did not really follow his career much. I was too busy learning about the Pagan Path and exploring my Irish roots. My interest was slightly rekindled with the release of the Davinci Code movie and Angels and Demons movie.

I watched them from time to time, but still did not really follow the news of the Papacy, until one day I heard that a Pope was retiring. My first thought was “WTF kind of prank is that, Popes die, they don’t retire” but further research confirmed that the Pope was retiring. So I followed this news with interest, the first time in 600 years this has happened, it was fascinating to me. I watched the reporting at St Pater’s Basilica and was very excited to see the white smoke again. Eventually I saw the announcement of Pope Francis.

Over the next few days I pondered about my interest in the Papacy (after all, I walked away from this faith years ago, and have devoted myself to a faith that often seems to react to Catholicism like Oil and Water). I also took some time to reflect on the three Popes I have seen in my lifetime. I came to the conclusion, a rather startling conclusion for many Pagans; I realized that I have learned a great deal from each of these men.

Pope John Paul II was the first introduction to a life of service I had really had. I did not understand how so many clergy, across the world, devote themselves to the betterment of humanity, that spend their lives in service to that which is greater than themselves. I had never really connected the idea of Priests, Rabbi’s, Shamen, Medicine Men and Women, Reverend's, Mullah’s, Monk’s, Nun’s (or any other religious person whom I have forgotten), and the lives they live, until I learned about the life of Pope John Paul II. This then led me to my second revelation: Tolerance.

Pope John Paul II was a Catholic man, he had spent his entire life in service to the Catholic Church, it’s members and it’s God. Here was a man who truly believed in the tenets of his faith, and yet he met with many religious leaders across the span of his time as Pope. His example by praying in a Synagogue, and removing his shoes to pray in a Mosque, was an example of understanding and respect that any member of any faith can learn from. He taught me to respect those who are different from me, while remaining true to my own heart and conscious. I was genuinely sad to hear of his passing.

The next Pope, Benedict XVI was a much different Pope. Being a man that was far more interested in preserving the Doctrine of the Church than building bridges the way his predecessor did. He also was considered a very flashy Pope, wearing designer shoes, golden crosses and big on pomp and circumstance. I have to admit, I did not cast favorable eyes in his direction. I heard a bit about the Church Sex Scandals and my opinion of the man fell lower than I had thought possible. Until the day he announced his retirement. I saw a frail, old man declaring to the world he no longer had the strength to carry on his work. From him I learned the value of tradition, and learning and accepting limitations.

Now I do not want to get into an argument about how awful he was, or about everything he did wrong. I acknowledge he made many mistakes and there was much he could have and probably should have changed. Having said that, I am not him, I was not in that position. While I would have done things differently, I cannot promise I would have done any better. I will leave his judgment in the hands of those he led, those who were wronged by his decisions, and the God he prays to. I do not have that right. And as I said, his example taught me some things. Ceremony and tradition is an important part of our lives, it gives continuity from one generation to the next. It gives us the framework in our lives, from which we are able to fill with meaning. Without this framework we would wander, no past to give us roots, and no way to envision a future to fly to. While I do not agree with many of their traditions, I respect it, and the right of people to follow it.

As to limitations, it must have been very hard for him to admit to the world at large that he was too weak to lead the Church. He acknowledged the decline of his physical state, admitting his body was failing. He also admitted to the strain psychologically, a man who prided himself on the power of his mind, admitted to the world that it too was failing him. I am not sure I would have been strong enough to admit this to the world, even when it was blatantly obvious. I also know that I struggle immensely with knowing my limits. I often work myself to exhaustion without resting, or admitting that I need rest. This old man, who I though was a jerk, taught me to care for myself.

Then came along Pope Francis. I have to admit, I rather liked him from when they first announced him as Pope. He presented himself to his followers in the plain white clothes of the pope, as simple Iron crucifix around his neck. No grand displays of wealth and power, he showed himself to the world as a simple man. Over the next few days my like turned to respect. After being elected he was offered the choice to take a limousine from the Sistine Chapel. He refused, instead telling the Cardinals that he rode with them to Conclave on the bus, and he will ride back with them. The man is well known for his frugality, cooking his own meals, using public transport and care for the poor and the homeless.

In the days that followed his election he greeted many of his followers, walking amongst them, touching their hands and blessing them. His inauguration speech had him reminding people to care for the poor, being compassionate towards each other and caring for the environment. From him I am learning humility and care for those around me. I was reminded of how sacred service to others is, how caring for those around me lifts us all, and brings us closer to the divine within and around us. His teachings have reminded me that every person around me is my brother and sister, and that kindness, compassion take more strength than my snarky and sarcastic impulses.

So there you have it, who would have thought that a Pagan would have every learned anything from the Catholic Church, and from three Popes! But the reality of it is when I set aside my arrogance, my ego fueled need to be right and them wrong, and opened my heart, I learned. Rather than being blinded by my own bigotry I allowed myself the gift of opening my eyes and hearing the words of another. I leave you now with a quote I stumbled upon recently, and a prayer that we, as human beings, work to listen, learn and respect each other.:

“I love you when you bow in your mosque, kneel in your temple, pray in your church. For you and I are sons of one religion, and it is the spirit. ”
       - Kahlil Gibran

Lessons from Babysitting

I just recently spent two days babysitting for my baby sister (she is just over six months old)! She is the cutest baby in the world and when my dad asked me if I would be willing to babysit for two days while he and his wife (who is a wonderful lady and an amazing mother!) was at a conference I jumped on the opportunity to have two days off and spend them with my sister! I have had the chance to babysit her a time or two before during the evening, but she usually was only up for an hour or two and then was she was asleep. So not much time to play with the baby!

In anticipation for the two days ahead I made sure I packed some fun music for us to listen to, a big picture book I had from when I was a kid and a few things for me to amuse myself with. I also swung over the night before and spent an hour visiting her so that I wasn’t a stranger in the morning. I got my instructions from dad regarding her schedule and got myself set up. Within an hour she was awake! The next two days flew by and taught me a heck of a lot, not only about babies, but about life in general.

One of the first things I found out about a baby is playtime! I had her in this saucer thing, the baby basically sits in it, with the supports going to her chest, leaving her arms free. Along the saucer are toys and bobbles she can pull at, chew on, spin around and push on. From the moment I put her in it she had to play with each and everyone of them, pulling on the plastic flower for a good chew (for babies everything goes in their mouths!). She then would spin the piece that spun around and made noise! She was constantly playing and laughing, having a great time!

When I got home I couldn’t help reflect on how much fun I had! It was so much fun to sit down beside her, making animal noises as I handed her soft plastic toys, making them dance around just to hear her laugh! So often in my life it is about deadlines, reports, balancing the household budget, cleaning the house, cooking, getting lesson plans for the youth group ready, discussing rules and regulations. It is very easy to get caught up in the details of day to day living. The two days with my baby sister gave me a chance to let loose and just play. To let my imagination take a run and to delight in the simplicity of a stuffed lion and making lion noises for her. Thanks to her I remembered the sheer joy of being alive, and what a blessing each day is!

The next thing I noticed is babies are busy! And my sister is no exception! She would wake up, have a bottle then a diaper change. From there we were ready to go! Often we were ready to go before slowpoke sister had finished changing the diaper. I had to figure out how to pin her with my arm long enough to get the diaper securely on (as it was the first time when I picked her up off the change table to dress her the diaper fell off and landed at my feet. Thank goodness she did not need to use it at that moment in time!) She would wiggle and kick and squirm about, and then giggle at me trying to keep up!

 After the diaper change and the challenging task of getting stocking on her (she has figured out how to pull socks off) I finished dressing and then we had play time. And she was not the kind to play with just one thing for hours on end. Nope, we had multiple things to play at, kind of like stations in Kindergarten. We would sit on the sofa, her propped up in the corner and me in front of her playing with all kinds of different toys. Then we would move onto the saucer,  and I would often hand her toys to play with. Around then it was bottle and change time, then we might then play with this cool little device that played sounds and music when you pushed different buttons (not sure if the baby or I had more fun with it), sometimes she would playing the jolly jumper, and other times I would dance around the kitchen with her in my arms, singing silly songs! Eventually she would just crash and have an hour long nap.

She never could seem to stay in the same place for long, she had to keep moving, keep busy. I thought of myself over the past winter. How many nice winter days I could have gone outside for a walk, or even tried an exercise video inside during the rough days. How many opportunities have I missed just by sitting on my derrière watching television (and DVD’s that I can watch anytime for that matter). She taught me the importance of staying busy and staying active, since those two days I am trying to get up and moving at least a few times a week, and rather than plunking my butt down to watch television I try to do something active, even if it’s just trying a new recipe, cleaning something or doing a craft of some kind.

The third thing I learned is that babies are curious! From the moment she woke up she had to watch, listen and touch everything. I was sitting with her on the couch, after feeding her I decided to have a banana. She was playing with some toys on the couch, watching me eat the banana. After I finished eating it I put the peel down on the table in front of me. I picked her up onto my lap and we began to make faces at each other. Suddenly *SPLAT* something slimy and banana smelling hit the side of my face! There was an eruption of laughter and another *SPLAT* to the side of my face. She laughed some more and I took the banana peel away from her. She held onto it and was trying to inspect it as I took it away from her.

Every new item I handed her had to be examined; she looked at it from all angles first, turning it around in her hand, dropping it and picking it back up. She would then give it a couple of ferocious shakes to see what it would do. Then she will put it in her mouth, and move it around, so that she could sample all edges. Anything that made noise received special attention, and had to be examined multiple times! She would do this without fail every time! If you handed her something twice she would examine it just as thoroughly, but at the third time she would put it down faster and reach for something new.

She seemed to always be looking for new experiences, new things to try. That made me think a lot about myself, in my Witchcraft Practices, and my everyday life. In my day to day life I tend to be far less adventurous! I often have my rut, I go to work, do my job, come home, cook dinner, clean a little, surf some of the same websites and go to bed, get up the next morning and do it again. She taught me to take the time to learn new things, to examine the world around me. I have decided to start saving some money and look into taking some interest courses. I have also bought a nice book on trees and plan on learning about the trees that grow in Central Alberta. I have also swallowed my fear and have applied for a new job!

The same runs in my witchcraft practices, I read the same authors, try the same variations of spells. Being with my sister for those two days taught me the importance of trying new things and not letting yourself stagnate! I am now currently going to try and learn the Tarot, I was gifted a deck year ago but never really took the time to study it! I am looking at perhaps learning two cards a week. If I get busy I can cut it down to a card a week and that should be manageable for me. This will give me a chance to expand my practice, and hopefully inspire me to pick up books that I normally would not read.

There were also lots of little, less earth shattering lessons I learned. For example I learned that if you put a baby in the center of a crib facing north, by the time you hear her wake up she will be facing south and be pressed right up against the bars. I learned that when dressing her you will get one leg into the stocking or pants, but by time you get the other leg in, the first one is out. I learned that if you have long hair with a baby you really need to keep it tied back, otherwise they will try to pull it out of your scalp to examine it. I also learned that a baby can fill a diaper to an extent that I did not even think was humanly possible, and will laugh almost manically when you go “OH MY GODS” at the sight before you.

 

All in all it was a very enriching two days. I was far busier than I had imagined I would be, had a ton of fun playing with her, and learned a lot about babies. I realized how blessed I am to have her in my life, and while I can't wait for her to grow a bit more and teach her some fun stuff, she is already teaching me more than I fathomed possible. I realized just how much courage and strength it takes to raise a child, and how blessed I was to have my parents. I realized how blessed she is to have our awsome dad, and a mother who is so kind, loving, creative and strong (and an amazing cook)!  I also realized that while I am nowhere near ready to have a child (I need a few more years to grow up), I will still babysit every chance I am offered!

Yours Humbly

The Redneck Pagan